So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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