Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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