Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize