that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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