im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?