i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
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You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
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I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
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