IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize