i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?