If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What changed your mind?
Being sober
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
