ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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