Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to rekindle our bromance
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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