on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
