Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
