I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize