She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
it's like iHOP with fire
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
