I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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