Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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