FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a shit load of segways right now
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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