your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
