the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
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Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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