In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Randomize
