I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
