he shaved USA in his pubs
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize