Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize