is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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