I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize
