I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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