At least make sure they are 18
Why
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
