I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
third nipple confirmed
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
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