how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
