there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize