I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
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I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
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