like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
