im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
