Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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