that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
