if you like me you must not know who I am
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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