Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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