I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize