do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
