he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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