Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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