I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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