hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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