I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
i out mim tonsoeep
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