I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
barbara walters just said penis...
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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