Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
He better not be in your backpack
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
