Sponge bath it is.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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