Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
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