Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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